We all have people in our lives that act as cheerleaders and who are great for our self-esteem. We also often have people around us who bring us down. Or maybe it’s a particular place or situation that makes you feel inadequate or self-conscious. It’s important to be aware of these people, places, and situations that will bring you down. When you know who and what they are, you can guard against them and if possible avoid them.
Become Aware Of The Negative Energy
Your self-confidence takes the biggest hit when you are unaware of the person or situation you’re walking into. When you feel blind-sided, it hurts, it and it’s hard to recover and rebuild your self-esteem and courage. I like to think of how these people, places, and situations affect us as negative energy. Your first task is to become aware of this negative energy and realize where it’s coming from before it hits you. By simply being aware you avoid being surprised. Try it.
Guard Against It And Neutralize It Going In (Don’t Forget Your Queen Shield!)
Once you are aware of what or who is bringing you down, you can start to guard against it. The basic idea is to neutralize the negative energy that’s being sent your way. One of my favorite ways of doing this is to expect it going in and realizing what’s causing it. For example, if your cousin always gives you a hard time about your weight, it may help to realize that she’s putting you down because she’s not happy with her own life. If you feel judged at a local club by a group of people, it helps to know that they may be doing it to make themselves feel better. Realizing this going in will go a long way towards neutralizing things. And remember, you have a Queen shield that you can put up to deflect that negative energy. It takes our permission to allow others to hurt us. And finally, another way to guard yourself is to do what you can avoid interacting with the people that bring you down and of course avoiding the places and situations that make you feel bad.
Adjust Your Life As Needed Until You Feel More Confident And Courageous
Last but not least, avoiding people, places, and situations that will bring you down is always an option. If you know a conversation with your sister will make you feel less confident, or you feel judged when going to a certain bar or club, avoid those people and places for now. I’m not saying you have to cut them out indefinitely. Instead, take a break and focus on building up your confidence and your self-esteem. When you’re ready, you can go back to spending time with those people or hanging out at those places and see how it goes. Often the experience is completely different for you when you approach it in a confident manner.
Don’t Miss A Thing
In case you missed one of the emails and posts, here are the tips I’ve shared so far:
Day 1 – Welcome to the Challenge
Day 3 – Making Courage A Habit
Day 4 – Look How Far You’ve Come
Day 5 – Scared? Do it anyway!
Day 6 – What’s Your Big Why?
Day 10 – Do More Of What Makes You Happy
Day 11 – Keep a Journal
Day 12 – We All Have Bad Days
Day 13 – Confidence Hack – Do It Anyway
Day 15 – Stop Negative Self-Talk In Its Track
Day 16 – It’s a balancing act…
Day 19 – Fake It Until You Make It
Day 21 – Random Acts of Kindness on Steroids
Day 22 – Focus On Solutions
Day 23 – Eat That Frog
Day 24 – The Power of Being Prepared
Day 25 – Make Yourself A Promise And Keep It
Day 26 – Let’s Talk Diet, Exercise and Sleep
Day 27 – Cultivate a New Habit